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Gorgeous Georgians,

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fierce and toothless

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BOTH:

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Horrible Histories presents our...

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show as a song

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BOTH:
some historical hits

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our best musical bits

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and gore.

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FARTS

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Oh, not bad

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It's really unfortunate he ended up
pooing himself to death.

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Hello, doctor.

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Oh, Mabel, good to see you.
How's the family?

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Oh, oh...

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Dead. Yeah, a lot of that
contagious plague going around.

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But enough about them.

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I've got these funny lumps and I
wondered if you knew what they were.

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I've got a poo sample
to help with the diagnosis.

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in the flesh

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their prognosis

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Ooh!

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on your armpits

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Is it serious?

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in hard lumps

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SNEEZES

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Oh, the plague! I thought
I'd managed to avoid

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the old Black Death.
What do you reckon caused it?

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causing fatal tumours...

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Are there any cures?

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with puppy's blood

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Urgh-urgh-urgh-urgh-urgh. Urgh.

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Bath full of wee. I've been thinking
of getting one of those,

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thanks, doctor.

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Oh, be careful who you talk to,
they might catch it.

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Urgh!

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Urgh!

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I feel slightly sick

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BOTH:

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the best for their kids

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Triangle? Not yet.

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One, two, three.

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Coincidence.

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I fought for my grandson too.

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was marry them all off

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Admittedly, it didn't
play out perfectly.

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hey, votta 'bout you?

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to all the mothers out there

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your children back

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to making sure it never happens

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Wow! My attempts at matchmaking
feel kind of weak right now.

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we do what we can.

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From 20th century Germany
comes the musical tale

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of the Dassler Brothers, whose
conflict changed the world's...

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..sports footwear.

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Horrible Historical Musicals
presents...

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in Herzogenaurach

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go fast

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BOTH:
in Bavaria

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AIR RAID SIRENS

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Two brothers, whose friendship was
ended when Rudi went away to war

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and Adi stayed home
to run the company.

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I'm running this company on my own
while Rudi is away.

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Maybe I should always run
ze company on my own.

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my soul says no to share it...

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And so Adidas shoes were born.

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But when Rudi returned from the war,
a rivalry was forged.

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I will create a rival shoe company
right here in Bavaria

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and guess what I'm gonna call it?
Ya, what is that?

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Oh!

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Ruda shoes!
Hmm...

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How about Puma?

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Sounds more "Rrarrr!"

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No?
Ya, fair enough.

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it's safe to assuma

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just can't get enough

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and I can play rough

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BOTH:
that you're so tough...

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The epic tale of the brothers
whose rivalry created

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two of the biggest shoe companies
in the world.

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BOTH:

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a brand-new pair

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The musical with sole.

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Mine are still better than yours.

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a family fight

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IN HARMONY:

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Ah, Monopoly!

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Football!
Oh, yeah, sorry.

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more than goals

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football's more than goals

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CROWD CHEERS

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CAR HORNS BLARE

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whilst stuck in traffic

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And look at us now!

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more than goals

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We know that

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Football's more than goals

261
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Football feels like home

262
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Not sure what I'm here for

263
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Playground or World Cup

264
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When your team is winning

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There's no better buzz

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Than when your fans are singing.

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ALL: Yeah!

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Kick that ball!

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High five.
Ha-Ha!

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Yeah!
Yeah.

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CROWD CHEERS

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Yeah!

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Ahhh!

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traditionally where one would go

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yeah, this water's so cold!

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to make your gout go

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279
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Now it's COOL to be by the sea

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284
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this vacation by the sea

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286
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bucket-and-spading. Oh, yeah!

287
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we're paddling and wading

288
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Break by the ocean

289
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290
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291
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DONKEY BRAYS

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maybe

293
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294
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295
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Break by the ocean

296
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BONES CRUNCH

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HE STIFLES A YELL

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299
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like to be beside

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I could provide

301
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supplied

302
00:13:02,560 --> 00:13:05,600


303
00:13:05,600 --> 00:13:07,440


304
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305
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cos I named it after me

306
00:13:13,480 --> 00:13:14,960


307
00:13:14,960 --> 00:13:17,640


308
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309
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Obviously, for a fee!
KER-CHING!

310
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311
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312
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313
00:13:28,680 --> 00:13:31,760

and their babies

314
00:13:32,920 --> 00:13:35,600


315
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316
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317
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318
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319
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Wish that we could stay

320
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321
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322
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Break by the ocean

323
00:13:51,600 --> 00:13:54,640


324
00:13:54,640 --> 00:13:57,120
Shall we all go
and get fish and chips?!

325
00:13:57,120 --> 00:13:59,560
Yeah! Yeah!
CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS

326
00:14:01,800 --> 00:14:03,320


327
00:14:03,320 --> 00:14:05,400


328
00:14:05,400 --> 00:14:07,680


329
00:14:07,680 --> 00:14:09,480

to call your own

330
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the kitchen is its heart

331
00:14:12,720 --> 00:14:14,640

over the years

332
00:14:14,640 --> 00:14:22,120
IN HARMONY:
to the staa-aa-aa-art!

333
00:14:22,120 --> 00:14:24,520
I was harmonising!
Well, that's one word for it!

334
00:14:27,160 --> 00:14:30,040
Mmm! Somethin' smells good!

335
00:14:30,040 --> 00:14:31,360
Wow!

336
00:14:31,360 --> 00:14:32,920


337
00:14:34,080 --> 00:14:35,960


338
00:14:37,160 --> 00:14:39,360


339
00:14:40,720 --> 00:14:42,680


340
00:14:44,200 --> 00:14:45,800


341
00:14:46,840 --> 00:14:49,240


342
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TICKING

343
00:14:50,880 --> 00:14:52,680


344
00:14:54,160 --> 00:14:57,280


345
00:14:57,280 --> 00:14:59,400


346
00:15:00,520 --> 00:15:02,440


347
00:15:04,480 --> 00:15:06,320


348
00:15:06,320 --> 00:15:07,760


349
00:15:07,760 --> 00:15:10,040


350
00:15:10,040 --> 00:15:11,480


351
00:15:11,480 --> 00:15:14,800


352
00:15:14,800 --> 00:15:16,560


353
00:15:16,560 --> 00:15:17,920


354
00:15:17,920 --> 00:15:19,240


355
00:15:19,240 --> 00:15:21,840


356
00:15:21,840 --> 00:15:23,040


357
00:15:23,040 --> 00:15:24,680

SNORING

358
00:15:24,680 --> 00:15:26,760
TICKING
DING!

359
00:15:26,760 --> 00:15:28,320


360
00:15:29,360 --> 00:15:30,880


361
00:15:31,880 --> 00:15:33,080


362
00:15:33,080 --> 00:15:34,920


363
00:15:36,080 --> 00:15:39,040


364
00:15:40,080 --> 00:15:41,600


365
00:15:41,600 --> 00:15:42,840


366
00:15:42,840 --> 00:15:45,240


367
00:15:45,240 --> 00:15:46,520


368
00:15:46,520 --> 00:15:50,000


369
00:15:50,000 --> 00:15:51,520


370
00:15:51,520 --> 00:15:53,640


371
00:15:53,640 --> 00:15:56,640


372
00:15:56,640 --> 00:15:58,360


373
00:15:58,360 --> 00:16:01,120


374
00:16:01,120 --> 00:16:03,320
Hey, shall I take 'em
to the fridge?

375
00:16:03,320 --> 00:16:04,720
Take 'em to the fridge!

376
00:16:04,720 --> 00:16:05,880
To my brand-new fridge?

377
00:16:05,880 --> 00:16:08,080
And do you like my washin' machine,
huh?!

378
00:16:08,080 --> 00:16:10,920


379
00:16:10,920 --> 00:16:13,560


380
00:16:13,560 --> 00:16:14,840


381
00:16:14,840 --> 00:16:17,640

Mm-hm!

382
00:16:17,640 --> 00:16:20,960

Yeah, tell 'em!

383
00:16:20,960 --> 00:16:22,680

Whoo!

384
00:16:22,680 --> 00:16:26,240

And a dishwasher too

385
00:16:26,240 --> 00:16:28,040


386
00:16:28,040 --> 00:16:31,960
BOTH:
a '50s house

387
00:16:31,960 --> 00:16:33,520


388
00:16:33,520 --> 00:16:35,520


389
00:16:35,520 --> 00:16:38,440


390
00:16:38,440 --> 00:16:39,920


391
00:16:39,920 --> 00:16:42,400

Whoo!

392
00:16:42,400 --> 00:16:45,520
This all seems like a lotta effort
to be honest.

393
00:16:45,520 --> 00:16:49,160
Woo-woo-woo!

394
00:16:49,160 --> 00:16:51,640
Oh and don't forget
to take out the trash.

395
00:16:51,640 --> 00:16:53,640
Papa's got a black bin bag.

396
00:16:56,000 --> 00:16:58,400


397
00:16:58,400 --> 00:16:59,840


398
00:16:59,840 --> 00:17:03,480

for crimes against music!

399
00:17:03,480 --> 00:17:06,920


400
00:17:06,920 --> 00:17:10,080

just run away actually

401
00:17:10,080 --> 00:17:14,080

is a foolish thing to do

402
00:17:14,080 --> 00:17:17,080

could come after you.

403
00:17:17,080 --> 00:17:19,080
Oohh!
Yeah.

404
00:17:21,800 --> 00:17:23,160
FABRIC TEARS

405
00:17:23,160 --> 00:17:25,320
Oi! You! Come back here!

406
00:17:25,320 --> 00:17:28,400
WHISTLE
You'll never catch me, copper!

407
00:17:28,400 --> 00:17:31,720


408
00:17:31,720 --> 00:17:34,960


409
00:17:34,960 --> 00:17:37,920


410
00:17:37,920 --> 00:17:41,040


411
00:17:41,040 --> 00:17:42,440


412
00:17:42,440 --> 00:17:43,720


413
00:17:43,720 --> 00:17:45,280


414
00:17:45,280 --> 00:17:47,760

thought I'd do meself a favour

415
00:17:47,760 --> 00:17:49,360


416
00:17:49,360 --> 00:17:51,040


417
00:17:51,040 --> 00:17:53,160


418
00:17:53,160 --> 00:17:54,680


419
00:17:54,680 --> 00:17:57,440

being a criminal myself

420
00:17:57,440 --> 00:17:59,920

be a lot better for my health

421
00:17:59,920 --> 00:18:02,680

Aha, aha

422
00:18:02,680 --> 00:18:04,640

it's pretty gritty.

423
00:18:04,640 --> 00:18:06,160


424
00:18:06,160 --> 00:18:08,760


425
00:18:08,760 --> 00:18:11,800


426
00:18:11,800 --> 00:18:13,040


427
00:18:13,040 --> 00:18:14,880


428
00:18:14,880 --> 00:18:17,880


429
00:18:17,880 --> 00:18:19,160


430
00:18:19,160 --> 00:18:22,200

my minimum income

431
00:18:22,200 --> 00:18:25,040

being a policeman

432
00:18:25,040 --> 00:18:28,280

part of the new norm

433
00:18:28,280 --> 00:18:31,160

A nice new woollen uniform

434
00:18:31,160 --> 00:18:34,080

Aha, aha

435
00:18:34,080 --> 00:18:36,080


436
00:18:36,080 --> 00:18:37,360
RECORD SCRATCHES

437
00:18:37,360 --> 00:18:38,920


438
00:18:38,920 --> 00:18:40,560


439
00:18:40,560 --> 00:18:43,600


440
00:18:43,600 --> 00:18:46,960

for our zero hours contract

441
00:18:46,960 --> 00:18:49,720
Out of my way, Peelers!

442
00:18:49,720 --> 00:18:51,160


443
00:18:51,160 --> 00:18:52,920


444
00:18:52,920 --> 00:18:55,960

compulsory whiskers!

445
00:18:55,960 --> 00:18:58,840

Aha, aha.

446
00:18:58,840 --> 00:19:00,920

Aha.

447
00:19:00,920 --> 00:19:04,160


448
00:19:04,160 --> 00:19:07,200


449
00:19:07,200 --> 00:19:10,200


450
00:19:10,200 --> 00:19:12,960


451
00:19:12,960 --> 00:19:16,440


452
00:19:16,440 --> 00:19:19,360


453
00:19:19,360 --> 00:19:22,600


454
00:19:22,600 --> 00:19:23,680
GATE CLANGS

455
00:19:23,680 --> 00:19:26,480


456
00:19:26,480 --> 00:19:28,160


457
00:19:28,160 --> 00:19:30,320


458
00:19:30,320 --> 00:19:32,160


459
00:19:32,160 --> 00:19:33,600


460
00:19:33,600 --> 00:19:37,520


461
00:19:37,520 --> 00:19:39,440


462
00:19:39,440 --> 00:19:41,320


463
00:19:41,320 --> 00:19:42,720


464
00:19:42,720 --> 00:19:44,080


465
00:19:44,080 --> 00:19:46,320


466
00:19:46,320 --> 00:19:48,240


467
00:19:48,240 --> 00:19:50,840

and the rest was a prison

468
00:19:50,840 --> 00:19:52,960


469
00:19:54,640 --> 00:19:57,960

went missing

470
00:19:57,960 --> 00:20:00,000


471
00:20:01,120 --> 00:20:04,640


472
00:20:04,640 --> 00:20:08,080

all of these terrible days

473
00:20:08,080 --> 00:20:10,800

Jane Grey

474
00:20:10,800 --> 00:20:12,600

Jane Grey

475
00:20:12,600 --> 00:20:17,120

must have thought she was made

476
00:20:17,120 --> 00:20:19,000


477
00:20:19,000 --> 00:20:20,680


478
00:20:20,680 --> 00:20:22,840
WHISTLING

479
00:20:22,840 --> 00:20:25,680


480
00:20:25,680 --> 00:20:29,400

and lions' den

481
00:20:29,400 --> 00:20:31,680


482
00:20:31,680 --> 00:20:36,520

swam in the Thames

483
00:20:36,520 --> 00:20:38,600


484
00:20:38,600 --> 00:20:40,000


485
00:20:40,000 --> 00:20:41,640


486
00:20:41,640 --> 00:20:43,440


487
00:20:43,440 --> 00:20:45,280


488
00:20:45,280 --> 00:20:47,120


489
00:20:47,120 --> 00:20:49,840

was a prison

490
00:20:49,840 --> 00:20:53,360


491
00:20:53,360 --> 00:20:57,120

it'll stand proudly

492
00:20:57,120 --> 00:21:00,160


493
00:21:00,160 --> 00:21:03,880

it'll end badly

494
00:21:03,880 --> 00:21:07,320

the historical things

495
00:21:07,320 --> 00:21:09,320


496
00:21:09,320 --> 00:21:11,680


497
00:21:11,680 --> 00:21:16,480

and the case was so thin

498
00:21:16,480 --> 00:21:17,760


499
00:21:17,760 --> 00:21:19,400


500
00:21:19,400 --> 00:21:21,360
WHISTLING

501
00:21:21,360 --> 00:21:23,000


502
00:21:24,200 --> 00:21:28,120


503
00:21:30,320 --> 00:21:33,320


504
00:21:33,320 --> 00:21:36,000


505
00:21:36,000 --> 00:21:38,640


506
00:21:38,640 --> 00:21:41,720


507
00:21:41,720 --> 00:21:44,320

went up in smoke

508
00:21:44,320 --> 00:21:46,800

- that's quite a sick joke

509
00:21:46,800 --> 00:21:50,080

come from?

510
00:21:50,080 --> 00:21:53,000
I don't know, but that
sounds like a cue for a song!

511
00:21:56,280 --> 00:21:57,680


512
00:21:57,680 --> 00:21:59,440


513
00:21:59,440 --> 00:22:03,160

but was doomed to fail

514
00:22:03,160 --> 00:22:04,920


515
00:22:04,920 --> 00:22:06,720


516
00:22:06,720 --> 00:22:08,960


517
00:22:08,960 --> 00:22:10,480


518
00:22:10,480 --> 00:22:14,320


519
00:22:14,320 --> 00:22:17,960


520
00:22:17,960 --> 00:22:21,960


521
00:22:21,960 --> 00:22:25,200


522
00:22:25,200 --> 00:22:27,160
BANG!

523
00:22:27,160 --> 00:22:30,360
Oh, this really help
seems to help my psoriasis!

524
00:22:30,360 --> 00:22:34,280

an eczema cure

525
00:22:34,280 --> 00:22:38,160


526
00:22:38,160 --> 00:22:42,240


527
00:22:42,240 --> 00:22:45,480


528
00:22:47,400 --> 00:22:49,240


529
00:22:49,240 --> 00:22:51,120


530
00:22:51,120 --> 00:22:54,880

that terrified and frightened folk

531
00:22:54,880 --> 00:22:56,920


532
00:22:56,920 --> 00:22:58,760


533
00:22:58,760 --> 00:23:02,280

with Wei Boyang's powdered mix

534
00:23:02,280 --> 00:23:06,000


535
00:23:06,000 --> 00:23:10,040


536
00:23:10,040 --> 00:23:13,960


537
00:23:13,960 --> 00:23:17,000


538
00:23:17,000 --> 00:23:20,600


539
00:23:20,600 --> 00:23:24,600


540
00:23:24,600 --> 00:23:28,640


541
00:23:28,640 --> 00:23:31,880


542
00:23:31,880 --> 00:23:35,920

zoom, zoom, zoom

543
00:23:35,920 --> 00:23:39,520

it's boom, boom, boom

544
00:23:39,520 --> 00:23:43,280

the room, room, room

545
00:23:43,280 --> 00:23:47,640

can resume, zoom, zoom

546
00:23:47,640 --> 00:23:51,720


547
00:23:51,720 --> 00:23:55,400


548
00:23:55,400 --> 00:23:59,200

did not go bang

549
00:23:59,200 --> 00:24:03,400


550
00:24:03,400 --> 00:24:07,200


551
00:24:07,200 --> 00:24:10,920


552
00:24:10,920 --> 00:24:12,640


553
00:24:12,640 --> 00:24:15,200
EXPLOSIONS


554
00:24:15,200 --> 00:24:19,160


555
00:24:21,920 --> 00:24:23,440


556
00:24:23,440 --> 00:24:25,200


557
00:24:25,200 --> 00:24:28,600

you'll end up in Aandamp;E

558
00:24:28,600 --> 00:24:32,640

in need of medical attention

559
00:24:32,640 --> 00:24:35,920

a special mention

560
00:24:35,920 --> 00:24:39,400


561
00:24:39,400 --> 00:24:41,320


562
00:24:41,320 --> 00:24:43,480


563
00:24:43,480 --> 00:24:47,160

my moment in the spotlight

564
00:24:47,160 --> 00:24:48,720
DRUM ROLL
Yeah!

565
00:24:48,720 --> 00:24:49,960
PRRRP!
Oh!

566
00:24:49,960 --> 00:24:51,440


567
00:24:51,440 --> 00:24:54,400

Oh!

568
00:24:55,520 --> 00:24:57,160


569
00:24:57,160 --> 00:24:58,600


570
00:24:58,600 --> 00:25:02,720

and it's pretty great

571
00:25:03,720 --> 00:25:07,680

operating theatre let's go

572
00:25:07,680 --> 00:25:12,200

now I'm really in the zone

573
00:25:12,200 --> 00:25:14,240


574
00:25:14,240 --> 00:25:16,000


575
00:25:16,000 --> 00:25:18,240


576
00:25:18,240 --> 00:25:20,240

and you can soon go home

577
00:25:20,240 --> 00:25:22,160


578
00:25:22,160 --> 00:25:24,080

I'm ready

579
00:25:24,080 --> 00:25:25,120


580
00:25:25,120 --> 00:25:26,440


581
00:25:26,440 --> 00:25:28,920

it don't cost you money

582
00:25:28,920 --> 00:25:31,560

we'll fix you up

583
00:25:31,560 --> 00:25:33,040


584
00:25:33,040 --> 00:25:35,680

and when you grow up

585
00:25:35,680 --> 00:25:37,000
Great, so let's go.

586
00:25:37,000 --> 00:25:41,040
ALL:
won his fight

587
00:25:41,040 --> 00:25:45,760

gets treated right

588
00:25:45,760 --> 00:25:49,960

from the young up to the old

589
00:25:49,960 --> 00:25:52,960

all right

590
00:25:52,960 --> 00:25:54,640
Whoa!

591
00:25:54,640 --> 00:25:56,520


592
00:25:56,520 --> 00:25:58,560


593
00:25:58,560 --> 00:26:00,440


594
00:26:00,440 --> 00:26:03,000


595
00:26:03,000 --> 00:26:04,480


596
00:26:04,480 --> 00:26:06,640


597
00:26:06,640 --> 00:26:09,280

here is your medicine

598
00:26:09,280 --> 00:26:11,240

for you all

599
00:26:11,240 --> 00:26:12,720


600
00:26:12,720 --> 00:26:14,480

you're ready

601
00:26:14,480 --> 00:26:15,760
Woohoo!

602
00:26:15,760 --> 00:26:19,280

and fix whatever feels funny

603
00:26:19,280 --> 00:26:21,520


604
00:26:21,520 --> 00:26:23,680


605
00:26:23,680 --> 00:26:25,880

even when you throw up

606
00:26:25,880 --> 00:26:28,040
BLEURGH!


607
00:26:28,040 --> 00:26:31,840


608
00:26:31,840 --> 00:26:36,680

and I feel all right!

609
00:26:36,680 --> 00:26:40,240

and now I'll take my baby home

610
00:26:40,240 --> 00:26:43,320

right through the night?

611
00:26:43,320 --> 00:26:45,000
Whoa-ho!

612
00:26:45,000 --> 00:26:47,800

Na-na-na

613
00:26:47,800 --> 00:26:49,360


614
00:26:49,360 --> 00:26:51,600

Look-look-look

615
00:26:51,600 --> 00:26:53,320


616
00:26:53,320 --> 00:26:54,800


617
00:26:54,800 --> 00:26:57,240


618
00:26:57,240 --> 00:27:01,760

Whoa-ho!

619
00:27:01,760 --> 00:27:05,480


620
00:27:05,480 --> 00:27:09,080

you could all access

621
00:27:10,400 --> 00:27:14,240

and it's still going real strong

622
00:27:14,240 --> 00:27:17,880

to the NHS.

623
00:27:17,880 --> 00:27:20,080
FIRECRACKERS POP

624
00:27:21,200 --> 00:27:23,320
Aa-aa-nd cut there!

625
00:27:23,320 --> 00:27:24,760
Dan's still rolling!

626
00:27:28,840 --> 00:27:30,840
LAUGHTER

627
00:27:31,840 --> 00:27:34,600


628
00:27:34,600 --> 00:27:39,920

Horrible Histories.